Saturday, May 28, 2005

Menards and Burlap; the root of all things evil.

Flowers a la Jenni Posted by Hello

Yesterday I went to Menards (which is like Home Depot, the root of all things evil) in search of burlap to line my new cute outdoor flower baskets (see above). The first person I see when I walk through the door was this kid (about 18 or 19 years old) wearing a blue vest with reflector tape and "Customer Service" written across the front. So I asked him, "Do you sell burlap?" And he looked at me like I was crazy. He then asked, "What is burlap?" WHAT IS BURLAP? Are you KIDDING ME? I don't know what kind of training you have to go through to be the bearer of the blue reflective vest, but it appears you have not completed it yet...what is burlap...dumbass.

So I ended up finding the burlap sacs, which were in the outdoor garden department and while sifting through them I got a whiff of this god-awful stench, like a mixture of sweaty gym socks and vomit. It was the burlap. I quickly grabbed two sacs between my thumb and pointer finger and headed for the checkout, which was at the OTHER end of the store. By the time I got there I was dry heaving and ready to yack right there in the “plunger” isle. The girl took one whiff and was like “ewwww.” I said “I know, lets get these rotten sacs into plastic bags as soon as possible and seal them tight.” While she was ringing me up I asked her “What do they ship in these things, rotting animal carcass?” Which caused the guy behind me to choke on his 12 oz Coke. Seriously! The total came to $1.07 and then I told her that they should pay me for getting these rank burlap hell buckets out of their store…burlap! Gross.


Charlie Mc said...

funny story....guess we both hate the "big store" hell!

Anonymous said...

they are actually shipped with the water fountains to protect the detailing. the fountains themselves are what smells but the burlap obviously picks up the scent. the guy you talked to was probably a carryout and would have no formal training on where burlap would be. sucks but its the truth.

Anonymous said...

Those burlap bags you bought actually had coffe beans in them from another country.b it is not the smell of the fountain. did you see any coffe beans in yuor bags?

Anonymous said...
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pleasedconsumer said...


Thank you for your blog. It is great.
I stumbled upon your blog as I was looking for consumer reviews about menards.

You may be interested also to review articles that I found right before yours.

Alex said...

I worked at the store at that time. You encountered the idiot carryout of the store. He never put effort into anything he did, he probably knew but he was too lazy to tell you. Sry you had to set foot in the store. I'm not a fan of menards, bad place to go.