"And the Hairy Ass Crack Shall Show Her the Way."

The gym I belong to is Northwest Althletic Club and they have about a dozen locations throughout the Twin Cities Metro area. Last night I had planned on going to the Eden Prairie location of which I have only visited once before. They have this class that I take at other locations called “Power Step,” which is an hour long class of advanced step aerobics, enough to make you double over in exhaustion a half hour into class, this is why last night over half the class left at the midway point.

Anyway, so only having been there once before I was a tad bit unfamiliar with the exact location of the locker rooms. So shouldn't I pay attention while looking for them? NAH, I’ll just eat my banana and read the class schedule as I randomly walk through the huge facitility in search of them. So I’m walking, and eating and not paying any attention, I see the sign that points towards the “Mens and Womens” locker rooms, so naturally I go, “that way.” I’m eating, reading, walking, eating, reading, walking, enter locker room, look up from schedule and immediately see a hairy ass crack passing infront of me. Yes, there I was, standing in the middle of the entry way to the mens locker room eating a banana. I was like a deer caught in the headlights and the look of horror must have been enough for some guy to feel sorry for me and say “Um, I think you’re in the wrong room.” NO SHIT Sherlock. I looked at him, said a sarcastic “Thanks,” turned around and walked out. I passed another guy on the way who smiled and said “Leaving so soon?” I didn’t realize that this gym was so full of wise guys…apparently so.