Monday, July 11, 2005

Ode to Spring Break, 1996

Ode to Spring Break 1996

Holy God, nice mall hair Jen. Jenni and Danika, "Overexposed" 1996. Posted by Picasa

About 10 years ago Danika and I took a trip out to Jackson Hole, Wyoming to visit Josh and his friends who at the time went to Montana State.

It all began with the prerequisite of cheap. We had planned on cutting some corners by creating a sort of “planes, trains, and automobile” type of vacation, because as poor college students we really had no choice.

So we set out to Jackson Hole via an airplane that left the Minneapolis St. Paul airport destined for Salt Lake City Utah. But before we even reached the airport we had a plan. A plan that included empty water bottles, Zima, and Jolly Ranchers; because what’s better than sneaking alcohol onto an airplane? Sneaking alcohol onto an airplane that has the potential to taste like apple jolly ranchers (Come on, we were not even 20 years old at this time, cut us some slack).

So we arrive in Salt Lake City with our booze and headed straight for the Greyhound bus station where we would catch a bus to Idaho Falls, approximately 200 miles north. It was upon the entrance of the station we decide to crack our bottles and toast a good luck cheers to our awesome vacation.

After being approached by many interesting people including a foreign exchange student who wanted to know how to spell “phat” you know as in “That car is really phat,” we decided to take a small tour of the area around the station. We somehow found a building which I believe was right outside the back of the station that dawned a giant gold statue on the top resemebing what I now know was a Mormon, and to give you a clue of our (or my) state of mind the following conversation ensued.

Jen: Danika! Look at that GIANT golden Muslim!”
Danika: “That’s a Mormon Jen.”
Jen: Right…let’s catch our bus.

So, we boarded the bus, which was filled with a cast worthy of a Saturday night episode of “Cops”…seriously. Upon boarding the bus we examined the company we were about to keep for the next 5 hours and headed straight for the back; because where else do the cool Zima drinking people sit? But at the back of the bus of course!

We were situated and comfortable and after a few more toasts we were introduced to Le Roy, his wife and their 5 month old baby. I swear to God his name was Le Roy. It’s like his parents were from the classy part of Detroit and decided to take a horrible name such as Roy and make it sound snazzy. After the obvious jokes about what their kid’s name was which included but were not limited to“Le Bob, and Le Frank,” the bus set out for our five hour tour. At each stop Le Roy and his wife would go out to smoke and leave their Le Baby with us drunk 19 year old college students.

So, to make a long story short we finally arrived in Idaho Falls where we were met by Brady, Jim, and Josh in Brady’s mom’s suburban with a full bar set up in the back. They had peach schnapps, rootbeer schnapps, Dr Mcgillicuddy’s, and every other kind of booze to get a young college girl smashed. So we were on our way for the next 90 mile stretch of highway that would lead us to our destination.

We arrived at our condo drunk and tired. And when we woke up the next morning we were ready to hit the slopes. We were probably on the slopes a good two hours when “the accident” happened. It was snowing and the flakes quickly turned to slush making it icy to boot. Josh, who is an experienced snowboarder, decided it was time to take us down the double black diamond. That’s right DOUBLE BLACK DIAMOND, because that’s what you do when you have two inexperienced skiers on an icy, snowy afternoon in the mountains.

What should have been the first clue that the double black diamond was probably not a good idea.  Posted by Picasa

I have no clue why we're blue in this picture...in fact it kind of creeps me out...blue...

It was going fine, until we got near the bottom and I thought I could handle it on my own. This is where I lose most of the recollection of the afternoon. All I remember is flying down the hill towards the chalet when I woke up, surrounded by a ski school. I was wet, injured, and missing my sunglasses. It was all bits and pieces from there and from what I’m told I was given a ride on the “dead sled,” x-rayed, and ambulanced to the local hospital. Yes, they ambulanced me to the hospital. I hated it and I couldn’t wait to get back to the condo.

After asking me where I was and who was the president and all of that other bullshit they sent me home with specific instructions for Josh to wake me up every two hours, in case I should slip into some sort of coma, which was not reassuring at all since I knew Josh and everyone else that night would be shit-canned.

When we arrived back in Salt Lake City, we hadn’t planned on reserving a hotel room because we thought it would be fine to sleep in the Greyhound station. Yeah, you read that right, “Sleep in a Greyhound station.” So, as you probably guessed we made some phone calls, and some more phone calls, and some more phone calls…you see, each and every hotel room was booked because the “National Bowling Convention” was in town. National Fucking Bowling Convention.

We were tired, we were hungry, and we were scared. So we gathered up our things and walked down to the local Mariott where we demanded they give us a room and if they didn’t we were going to camp out in their lobby. Surprisingly, since our phone call, they miraculously came up with one available room, equipped with two queen sized beds and a mini bar. We handed over our plastic and $150 later we were officially the occupants of a relatively comfortable hotel room. $150 for a hotel room in 1996? We could have stayed at the fucking Westin in Tokyo for $150 ferchrissakes. But still, it was like winning the lottery, only we had to pay for it and it wasn’t as exciting.

We did make it back, and with plenty of stories to share with our dorm mates. It’s nearly 10 years later and we’re still laughing about all of our misfortunes, but it was an experience that has bonded these two bloggers together. It was our “Spring Break 1996.”


i.marzipan said...

I love this story... especially the part where we blew our entire vacation budget just to get a hotel room in SLC. Damn bowlers... also fun was how the bus driver knew we were smashed and kept smiling at us. Because we were 19 we panicked, "oh my god, we're so busted!", as if he cared! I was so jealous when you got a ride down the mountain, my knees still hurt when it rains after snowplowing down a double black diamond! Love ya, Jen! You're the perfect 'partner in crime'.

Mpls_red said...

I actually bought some really great bowling shoes at that convention.

x said...

I hope Le Roy was able to scrimp and save and buy a Le Car.

That is an awesome story. The kind of memories that bond friends forever.

Nic said...

Oh Jenni - Ouch. There is nothing worse than double black diamond... Oh, wait. Yeah, there is. Triple Black Diamond.

At least they make for good stories after you survive them.

Double Black Diamond and a Greyhound Bus trip all on the same vacation? You are a brave, brave girl indeed!

mr_g said...

That's a great story. Cross country trips and hotels are endless sources of fun in college...from what I remember based on the pictures I took...