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Thursday, August 11, 2005

Jenni's Brush with Death, Part II

I am still trying to get over the fact that I almost died...twice...a few days ago. Well, Ok, maybe I didn't almost die, but I could have been severely mamed, and in one case I was...well, maybe not severely. Here, have a look for yourself.

The following nature pictures were taken from my car at approximately 3:09 in the afternoon. Notice how dark it is.



In this next picture it's actually ligtning. Do you know how dangerous lightning can be? Especially when you're sitting in your car with a complete set of golf clubs in the trunk...death by nine iron. Not fun.


This one was taken while I was driving. Note: I can't see anything. At all.



Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, it does. That night I came home and was planning on making some grilled eggplant with pesto sauce and saffroned jasmine rice. In order to make the pesto I had to get my Cuisinart from the cabinet above my built in microwave which is above my stove. I was on my tippy toes struggling to get it down all in one piece when this (see below)

fell out of the cupbord smashing into my poor little nose on the way down. In an instance that will forever be called "Maming by Cuisinart." See Photo:

As you can see there is a nice size gash on the right side of my nose, visible to anyone who looks at me. I am scared, and my near-death experiences have caused me to be a little more careful around severe thunder storms and kitchen appliances.

Until next time death...I bid you adieu.

P.S. The reason this is part two is because it's a sequel to The Day I Almost Died...duh! GOSH!

20 comments:

Sunfish said...

You know what they say: third time's a charm!

Sandra said...

Did you still make the pesto after the Cuisinart brush with death? Man, you were almost a food processor death statistic. Be careful, hon!

mikey said...

whoa. it's like you're in Final Destination 3 or something...

darianj said...

Dun DaDun Dada Da
Dun DaDun Dada Da
(Music from the tornado scene in the 'Wizard of Oz')

OK, it wasn't a full house lifting tornado; but those pic's shows it was a pretty bad storm.

I think the close calls mean that the Grim Reaper is having a tough time getting to you. You'll probably live to be as old as the women in your previous post!

Brian said...

If it's raining so hard that you can hardly see out the windshield would you....

A. Focus really hard on driving and on staying in between those helpful little white lines on the road

B. Test your tires and try and make the car hydro-plane

C. Try and take a snapshot of the situation out the windshield of your car with your camera phone so you can update your really cool blog, while adjusting the radio and drinking coffee

(I think we all know which answer Jenni picked)

Thister said...

Dang! Death by Cuisinart would have been horrid. You would've become one of those "New of the Weird" people that you read on Yahoo News.

On the brighter side, at least you survived it all and lived to tell the tale. Haha!

Jenni said...

Sunfish: That was way too grim reeper for me...thanks for the props.

Sandra: I KNOW! And the pesto was made...however I didn't do it. I was too busy applying pressure.

Mikey: Yeah, but I defied it...maybe they'll make a final destination just for me. It's all about severe storms and kitchen appliances...moahahahaha

Darian: Thanks, I hope he can't find me.

Brian: When in doubt always choose "C" didn't you know that? Duh!

Thister: You must know me, only my death would be posted in something with the title "weird"...it's inevitable.

g2 said...

Hmmm, maybe those were signs....
Thunderstorm.....
A sharp blade....
The next morning, did you notice if a hairless cat was sitting outside of your place??
If so....watch out!!!!!

Jenni said...

A hairless cat...nope. However, a couple of weeks ago while taking Lola for a walk I crossed the path of two, yes, TWO black cats...all within a whole 10 feet of eachother. I so thought I was going to die right then and there. However, I believe my white dog cancelled out those two black cats. It only makes supersticious sense..right?

x said...

it was probably the fluidity learned in your aqua cardio that saved you

g2 said...

Hmmmm....
I'm not sure if the white dog cancels out two black cats, that's alot of bad luck to cancel out!!
Maybe the cats were on some bad catnip and they just didn't have the mojo they needed to do their thang!!!

madison's favorite son said...

screw the scrath. let's discuss how perfect those lips are.

Charlie Mc said...

DON'T GO NEAR THE TOASTER WITH ANY FORKS......

neal gardner said...

you lead a life of danger. i bet johnny cash never got a cuisinart-inducing gash.

John S. said...

Looks like you got one incident for each cat, the white dog didn't seem to work. Maybe if you put garlic around the white dog's neck it will be more effective at deterring evil.

madman said...

DAMN--I still don't know if you are lucky or unlucky! Either way it makes a good story! By the way--I had to fly in that shit.

Paul said...

Cooking is so damn dangerous.

Ms. Wobbly Bits said...

Man, I feel for you!!! I busted out lauging at work though!

Muad'Dib said...

Jesus. That scar is cute. All girls should get one.

markus said...

those cuisinart blades are dangerous! i did the same thing once only it fell onto my finger and sliced it good!