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Monday, May 22, 2006

Sign Savy

I hate it when people post dumb signs that tell you to do or not do the obvious. Like the tampon sign that's always hanging in the bathroom to remind us Laides not to flush our tampons or tampon applicators down the toilet.
The following is a sign I happened upon while visiting the Ladies room at one of my dealerships.


What this sign should read:

Congratulations! You’re a FREAKING retard! Even more so if you are able to read this sign and lack the common sense to figure out how to lock and unlock this door.
How do you make it through life? Please press the large red button on the wall to the left of you (your other left) and wait for the large man in the yellow short bus to come and take you back to the first grade where you can associate with people of similar intelligence and door locking and unlocking know-how.

Dumbass.

19 comments:

Barry said...

Don't you just love it? You have to wonder - exactly why did someone feel it neccessary to make that little sign?

mysterygirl! said...

Yeah, you know whoever made that sign locked herself in the bathroom all day, or had to call the fire department for someone else who trapped herself... haha.

The Muse said...

Okay, really? That's ri-damn-diculous. Its not like its a complicated lock. Or an antique door where rough handling could possibly damage it.

But it does remind me of the scene in Can't Hardly Wait when Seth Green and Lauren Ambrose's characters got locked in the bathroom at the party because the door knob fell off...

Anonymous said...

The icons used to represent the locked and unlocked position look like the stupid faces people leave in emails. :)

Anonymous said...

So Jen, how long were you stuck in the bathroom.

Jenni said...

Anna, I SO know that last comment was left by YOU!

Oh, and about 5 minutes.

glenda said...

great blog!

F Train 2 Brooklyn said...

How often must this have been a problem to compel someone to actually post an instructional note? What kind of people work there?

Neil said...

Uh, I hope you don't work in customer relations...

Huevos McGringo said...

that's like the most common doorknob in america in commercial settings.

also the drawings are tiny and initially unclear, and probably result in more delay than the lock ever would.

treespotter said...

what i never figure out is when they have instructions to use the toilets (always flush, and sitting how-tos). it's everywhere in asia, especially airports.

are there really people out there that doesn't know where to direct and aim their bum in the toilet??

Leezer said...

At my workplace there is a sign that says, "close the door when in use." WTF????

Anonymous said...

I once saw a sign on a farm that read, "Stay out, this means ewe!"
Little did i know it was a horse barn and sheep weren't allowed in. Funny, I saw the same sign on the farmers bedroom door.

Momentary Academic said...

Oh no. That sign just says so much about simply inductive skills.

Hope your voice comes back!

Mpls_red said...

I remember some time ago at some place the men's room was out of order so I used the ladies room. While in there I made two observations: 1 - women tend to be less clean in the restroom, I have know this since I worked in the bar business but going to a non-bar restroom reaffirmed this assumption. 2 - there was a bin that said "Place napkins here". At first, I didnt understand what that men. Then it dawned on me! Thank God I didnt rest my arm on it while doing my business. I did put the seat down when I was finished, thank you very much.

Heather B said...

I love the part in Tommy Boy when Richard is explaining how to use a seatbelt ... it cracks me up.

And if you have never seen Tommy Boy ... you should :)

Anonymous said...

Don't use the word 'retard' in describing people. That is very ignorant of you.

Todd C said...

This is in comment to the last comment made by anonymous. The word 'retard' would only be a disparaging word if used to describe a mentally handicapped person. There is a second definition (Websters Dictionary), "a person considered to be foolish or socially inept", and that was the context used here. Don't try and make someone feel bad when you're ignorant yourself.

Jenni said...

Thanks for looking out for me Todd...you're the best!