Wednesday, February 08, 2006

A Day Late and A Dollar Short

Well, actually 688 dollars short. That's what I'm out after sitting in the Auto Repair Shop yesterday for 7 hours while they fixed my car. Which brings me to my Haiku for "Haiku Tuesday"...although it's Wednesday...nevermind.

Auto repair shop
Six hundred dollars for brakes
Where's my vasoline?

And that's not all...the following is an excerpt from a draft I wrote during hour 5. Enjoy.

Today I was held hostage by my car, aka, "The Rollerskate." I'm not talking "hostage", my car pointed a gun at my head and demanded things "hostage," I'm talking my car decided to want new brakes and then wouldn't start after I've already waited at the Auto repair shop for five hours kind of hostage.
And for a special bonus, turns out when you spill break fluid on corroded spark plugs your car doesn't start.
It also turns out that when you sit there and stare at a Pepsi machine and 9-inch television for hours on end you tend to go a little batty. Like the kind of batty that makes you want to throw the uncomfortable chair that your ass has been planted in all morning and half the God-forsaken afternoon out the mother-fucking window. That kind of batty.
Actually, I am normally a very patient person, but when a job that was supposed to take two hours takes five (and counting) it tends to wear that patience a little thin...or more like stretch it to the point of snapping.
(Flick the paper in a way that makes it snap...like my patience)
My handwriting sucks. Seriously. It's a wonder how I can read one word I wrote on this page. Has my friendly laptop lead to the destruction and consequential demise of what used to be my artform? My beautiful handwriting that no resembles that of someone with Parkinsons and a pen?


Lauri said...

Seven hours would test anyones patience. I can't even sit in those places when my oil is being changed..too much sweat and oil.

The Muse said...

*removes all sharp objects, including pen, from Jenni's reach*
Okay, it's all going to be okay... Next time, just bend over a little bit further and bring your own lube. Or, you could just flash them.

I keed, I keed. ;)

Paul G said...

Give me the name and phone # of the place.
I'll "take care of it."



i.marzipan said...

Jen -

Alexander's Imports
(612) 729-2516

Seriously, this guy is a gem. He saved me over $1,000 in repair fees, and he's doing exactly what the dealership recommended. AND he explains everything to you like you're an intelligent human being, not like you're a silly girl.

I know what you mean about handwriting... my hands have atrophied so much that I can barely write a sentence. I fear for the next generation.

Momentary Academic said...


So sorry. That sucks.

And you're right about the handwriting. Has the typing done us all in?

heather k said...

If they were nice, they would have given you a loaner. What jerks.

x said...

I love a good "bend over" from the mechanic. It can feed my fantasies for weeks.

Fantasies of homicidal revenge, that is.

Sandra said...

Steve's Tire and Auto on the corner from you, seriously!! The most honest mechanics anywhere. I had one place tell me my electrical system was shorting my tail light, it would be $400, Steve's put in a new lightbulb for 74 cents. It worked fine after that.